I have a strange fascination with Coke Zero. I sometimes dare to call it a sudden and random addiction, but this is not one of those times. At this point, I’m in control. Speculation exists as to the horror of the taste. I currently decline addiction, but I don’t shy away from the idea of bias, so in my opinion, it’s lovely. But much to my chagrin, I’ve heard the taste described as “artificial”, “strange”, “worse than Diet”, and “like ass.”
My mother favors the vote of, “Das schmeckt eigentlich ganz gut … kann ich doch ab und zu trinken.”
‘Ab und zu!’ How about, ‚immer wieder’? How about desperately searching Walgreens at vain at 12:30? How about screeching that Pepsi has intruded too far into the enclaves of modern society, much like garbage bands and their like-minded indie ilk, and stomping out in favor of a 24-hour convenience store, whilst glaring at the emo haircut, sculpted just so to fall into his right eye, of the late night cashier?
I write. I don’t usually count science as an art, but maybe it is. How can it truly have zero calories? Amazing science. Now when that can be said for a piece of chocolate cake, as my friend put it the other day for an unrelated episode, then the earth will fly into sun and we’ll all die. Leaving us to enjoy no cake obviously, and what’s the merit in that?
For me it seems shaving a meager 200 or so calories off of the 4000 calorie monstrosity that sustains me at all the right times of the month might be a small but worthy step in the correct direction for humanity.