Call me…Umbrella Woman.

It hardly rains here. As opposed to the snow in the winter that most of the country has gotten, we have gotten rain. To incorporate this my new graduate learnin’, let’s give a slightly syllogistic example. Inferring from the first two statements, one could assume that I must be living in a rather temperate climate and/or that I am currently in the winter season.

But I am happy with the rain. With the rain I finally get to use my awesomely cheap umbrella. It’s one of those automatic umbrellas, which shoots out and unfurls into place at the touch of a button. J scoffed at me being lured in buying an umbrella on a hot, sunny summer day, during our local span of 300 (or so) continual hot and sunny days we get a year.

The most fun came when I left the English building. My umbrella handle had been sticking out diagonally out of my backpack at shoulder height, so in mid-stride, I swiftly reached across my body and unsheathed my umbrella from my Jansport scabbard. I then held the umbrella out in front of me and clicked the button. The umbrella sprung open and somehow rhythmically fused with my step so that I could swing the umbrella smoothly over my head.

I felt like a total badass.

I also felt a bit like Mary Poppins. I was slightly hoping that Dick Van Dyke’s chimney sweep character would come and latch onto my arm. With twinkling eyes, he would ask me to clean his chimney stack, ah… to have tea with him and penguins and we would float up into the dewy skies. Sadly white corsets don’t fit in with my preconceived notions of svelte kick-assery, but flying definitely does.

5 Responses to Call me…Umbrella Woman.

  1. eatsbugs says:

    Gotta love a fately well-choreographed umbrella moment. Next thing you need is two blondish children to follow you around and demand that you play a game with them. But perhaps you should get married first.

  2. E says:

    Badass + Mary Poppins = This?

  3. firewings says:

    Oh God. *clasps hands over eyes* I remember that one… I saw that in theaters even.

    But you do have to take in account how old I was at the time.

  4. The Rebuker says:

    White corsets, not bad-ass. But black pleather corsets (á la The Matrix or Underworld), those are de rigeur for the ass-kickin’ modern woman.
    This is slightly off-topic, but do you think Mary Poppins is kind of hot?

  5. firewings says:

    Julie Andrews is gorgeous, and has this depth grace that I can’t even hope to attain, but in Mary Poppins she seems too stern, too dominatrix-y. Not my “thing” in a woman, to be clear. (If I have specific “things” in woman. No, D, I’m am not closeted.)

    Now Julie Andrews in The Sound of Music? Yeeeeah. ^_^

Leave a comment