Heavy Duty Hair Machinery

The last Wal-Mart trip I decided that I hadn’t really spent any money in while (which isn’t true) and needed to be nice to myself (for which I don’t have a particular reason for that either). What kooky item need did I indulge in this time?

Naturally, a hair straightener. My hair is doing that oh-so-graceful under curving that my Mom covets, and with the same reason that I cannot have black hair, I refuse to have the same hair style as my mother. Let’s get a little photo-blogging going on here. I had to edit my photograph because I was parading around in my skivvies, even decadently showing my tattoo. Before

[Did I say that I was getting more during the summer? I’m posting this purely to see if my Mom is keeping up with my blogs. If she is, I’ll get a phone call tonight with her pleading me not to get anymore tattoos. When I mentioned dying my hair blue again, I got a call with her frantically asking if I was REALLY going to do that.]

As for a more valid reasoning for the purchase is my abiding hatred of the blow dryer. I have never been able to stand the time-honored and mostly woman-specific occupation of drying my hair that doesn’t include sticking my hair out of the window of my car. What’s so bad about it? It’s the noise. It’s usually too early in the morning for having Satan and his minons bellow into my ear.

Both my Mom and J were a bit skeptical, with my Mom asking with a bit of a laugh, “Don’t you have straight hair already?” As per usual, I didn’t listen to any voice of reason. “There are ions to combat frizz! It should dry my hair! Awesome!”

Now for putting the theory put into practice. With my ancient curling iron (Yes, I have a curling iron. I know. No, you haven’t seen me use it.) you turned it on and go for coffee. This flat iron was ready to go in less than a minute. Plus it gently beeped at me, telling me that it was at my service. I cranked up the heat per the instructions for using it on wet hair and grabbed a chunk of wet hair. Holding it vertically, I clamped on and pulled. It steamed and from the dark wet hair came perfectly dry, non-burnt hair. Wha! YES!

Sadly, I could not take pictures in mid-progress because I wasn’t wearing a shirt. If I showed that, then I would have to show you the following pictures where my nymph-like friends came over and we all somehow fell into a vat of pudding, right?

Right? Right. Besides, I need to keep it family friendly over here.

Did it work? I’m not sure. I got a little impatient with drying small strands and just said, “This’ll do for round one.” It may have added some frizz…but the drying ability – crazy cool.


HWSNBN told me blankly after picking up a strand of my hair, “I’m sorry…but it doesn’t look any different than it did yesterday.”

The ions people, the ions.


6 Responses to Heavy Duty Hair Machinery

  1. kc says:

    Well … that was a pretty cool trip down memory lane(looking your photos that is). We need, nah, we demand more photos!

    “Yes, glasses even” … that was a great photo. hehe …

    As for your curling iron/blow dryer/hair straightener thingie mabob … Most women I know carry those in your purse so my advice to you would be, get a bigger purse 🙂

    Ands lets keep the site PG for the kiddos.

  2. thebutton says:

    Well that last pic is rather cute. And being that I don’t see you on a regular basis, I honestly can’t say there is a difference or not. I once had a hair straitener thingie mabob and got annoyed with it. This chicka has a ton of hair. Thusly why I dig my shorter do where I can wash and flick the water droplets out of my hair, scrunch (only sometimes when I want more wave) and go.

    Does yours have an attachment for crimping? Mine did, but I was too scared to venture back to the late 80’s, early 90’s to test it out. Hehe.

    Do enjoy playing with your new toy. You do look quite pleased with it. Ions!

  3. firewings says:

    Purses, while pretty to have and buy, still seem relatively impractical. Did MacGyver have a purse? No, thus, the need truly is not there.

  4. firewings says:

    Sarah asked me that too, “Does this mean…you’ll be crimping?” She asked me after I told her I was going to gym if I was going to tell her soon that she needed to drink protein water.

    No, I think they want to keep the crimping back in the 80’s; they don’t even include the attachment for that.

  5. eatsbugs says:

    Nice pic. You remind me of Joanna Newsom. She’s cool. She plays harp.

  6. E says:

    You’re looking pretty darn snazzy. Bravo!

    Don’t crimp. I think you’d have a bit too unsettling resemblance to Jessie from Saved by the Bell.

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