IP Birthday

A year ago today, I wrote my first little post on WordPress about the joys of Coke Zero. Beyond discovering an addiction, where was I then?

I was mourning my idiocy of losing a love.
I had just started grad school and realizing the absurdity of the situation I had found myself in.
I was watching my Dad die. That I didn’t blog about.

The night my Dad died, and after I saw him in the funeral home, I sat bathed in a grip of apathetic listlessness that surfaces at the onset of my heavier mental instabilities. I sat under the bright lights of the living room in a recliner moved to the exact place where his bed stood just that morning. I saw his wallet sitting on the table that sat next to his bed and grabbed it, slowly pulling things out of it.

It was a cold reality that he could no longer stop me.

I thumbed through various cards and old photographs of me. From a flap, I pulled out a folded piece of paper. I unfolded it and read the URL to my very first blog that I started when I was 16.

Now, I’m here and I write for something intangible as that. I write to my friends, to my enemies, to my family, to myself… and I think that somehow, most importantly, I’m writing for some unknown purpose that only later will manifest itself. I do not concentrate on that outcome. In theory, I should not only be living to blog, but I should live as I blog.

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9 Responses to IP Birthday

  1. eatsbugs says:

    See? See?! Life beyond the internet! It’s a myth, I tell you!

  2. firewings says:

    Life outside the confines of internet scares me.

    Hold me!

  3. E says:

    A birthday celebration?!? Where is the cake and ice cream?

    Clowns?

    Strippers?

  4. firewings says:

    Strippers…I knew I forgot something in my post.

  5. K says:

    This was a great read. It’s always interesting to see why people blog, for some it’s fame and fortune, others its to vent and for some it’s reflection. For me, it’s personal reflection and it’s interesting to see the evolution of one self, both good or bad.

    -K

  6. firewings says:

    I’m gunning for fame and fortune myself.

  7. K says:

    yay for new photos!

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